Monday, July 09, 2007

The Complaints Department is Officially OPEN

1. Mr. Law Professor, we salute you! A big salute to all the law professors of the world who conspired to make me take this exam whilst I could be out in the real world making some actual money with my hard earned degree.

2. Mr. Bar Examiner, we salute you! While making me study to study to study some more, you will be writing your question, which will determine my future and whether or not I can make aforementioned cash money, in your evening hours, off the top of your head, in whatever you practice everyday.

3. Mr. Herpes Zoster, we salute you! For infecting most all individuals in the United States and then, at moment of stress, rearing your ugly, pimplely little head in the dear wifey and making her study from the bed. And for getting me earlier this year. You are a true bastard of a virus.

4. Mr. Drugy Man, we salute you! For making our outbreaks more manageable, though your purple pill still leaves us with a groggy funk, that makes us wonder if the disase you suppress might just be better to run its course.

5. Mr. Librarian Electrition, we salute you! For failing to change any of the lights above my cube and propetuating my every developing coronary condition known as blindness.

6. Mr. Bar Review Man, we salute you! For admitting you don't know the answer to these questions, for simply reading off your script, and telling us good luck for the 10,000th time.

I was going to do 10, but I think I'll ask my peeps to give the last 4. Who's getting your goat?


Ally said... only complaint is Mr. Pass Me Because There are Five Whole Feet Between me and the Next Car. As I was driving back from Macon on Sunday evening, I realized that I got passed any time I left an acceptable (and legal darnit) distance between the car in front of me and my car. Everyone else was riding the car in front of them, and several times I observed people having to go off-road/on the shoulder when anyone braked because they were so close to the car in front of them. Sigh.

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking you should clarify that Mr. Herpes Zosster is SHINGLES, not the herpes STD. Funny as it is, wifey might not want to be mischaracterized as yo' dirty ho'. Even though she might well be. ;') Ha!

Hang in there - bar sucks, I did it two years ago. :(


Wifey said...

PMBR Question writers, we salute you! Because you've made it your sole mission in life to make me feel like I know even less than I thought possible. So you go on with your bad self, publishing books of impossible questions in minuscule type. Just know that I'm officially breaking up with my red and blue books---that's right, PMBR., your brand of pain isn't welcome here anymore. Go give someone else the shingles.